Love letters don’t get the credit they should. Overlooked in favor of Facetiming, Snapchat and Instant Messages, they go unappreciated as a form of communication.
The first letter I wrote to a woman was while on summer vacation from college. It wasn’t to a girlfriend, although I had a serious crush on her. I was incredibly shy and never got up the nerve to tell her I liked her. Like others who snoozed, I lost. She soon had a boyfriend and as fate would have it. I later dated (and married) someone who ended up being her roommate for a year. Rumor has it the letters I wrote that summer still exist and I’m curious as to what my twenty-year-old self had to say?
I later wrote letters to that girl I married while I was doing a summer internship in Cincinnati while she was in Georgia. They (along with a $400 phone bill) ensured we stayed in contact and no doubt enhanced our relationship.
It was many years later when I found myself writing love letters once more. They were to a woman in the Midwest, starting as a romantic gesture on a dare. She said, “Nobody write’s love letters anymore, write me a letter?”
We had just started communicating with each other and neither of us was in love. But once challenged, I had little recourse but to write. It was the beginning of the most intense and introspective communications in my life.
I often lose arguments because I don’t think of what I should have said until the moment has passed. I think I’m undefeated when it comes to love letters. Given time to compose a letter I’m a dangerous man.
The letters were about so much more than persuasion and seduction. They forced me to consider my past and my future, what I really want vs. what I’d always told myself? What was the place for God in my relationship? What is love, anyway?
I happen to think love letters can play an important role in any relationship whether after the first date or twenty years in. If one regularly writes letters to their significant other, they become even more significant. They occupy your mind as you consider your next topic. You say the things you sometimes forget to say including “Thank you,” and “I love you” in a setting outside of bed. I challenge those out there to write their loved one a letter and request a reply. I’ll bet good things happen!
The letters I wrote have been compiled and are on target to be released as a book around Valentine’s Day. I’m amazed at some of the things I learned as I wrote because writing brings me focus. Couldn’t we all use a little more focus in our relationships? Try writing a love letter!